I got back together with my cheating ex but my family won’t forgive her
DEAR DEIDRE: MY ex and I have got back together after splitting because I caught her flirting and sending explicit messages to other men on social media. We’re both trying really hard and everything is going well except my family refuses to forgive her. I made the mistake of telling them all the gory details of […]
DEAR DEIDRE: MY ex and I have got back together after splitting because I caught her flirting and sending explicit messages to other men on social media.
We’re both trying really hard and everything is going well except my family refuses to forgive her.
I made the mistake of telling them all the gory details of her flirtatious posts and now they insist I am a fool for trying with her again.
I am 31, she is 29 and we have a five-year-old daughter together. She had been cranky and sex had dried up for a while but I put it down to lockdown frustrations.
It all fell into place when our daughter was playing with her phone. While I was helping, notifications came in for an account I didn’t recognise.
When I opened it up I was faced with my girlfriend posing in our bathroom in all sorts of states of undress. In some, she was completely topless. I was furious and felt utterly betrayed.
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She denied cheating and said I didn’t give her attention any more, but after seeing those messages I couldn’t trust her.
I moved back to my parents’ home and only saw her when I picked up our daughter every other weekend.
But once she heard I’d been going on dates, she started changing the arrangements last minute and made access really difficult.
I grew up in a single-parent household and wanted my daughter to have both parents in the picture. I swallowed my pride last December and asked her to give us another go. She agreed to try one more time.
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I thought it was going to be an uphill battle, but our relationship is better than ever and our sex life is great. The problem is my friends and family don’t support my decision.
Every time we FaceTime, they won’t speak with her, and won’t include her in our post-lockdown plans. Is it time my loved ones got on board?
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DEIDRE SAYS: It’s lovely that your family is looking out for you but they need to be careful they don’t ruin your relationship and your immediate family.
It’s great you are putting your daughter’s happiness first and are trying again with your girlfriend. You do need to make sure you keep working on your relationship to ensure both her happiness and your own.
Ultimately your family needs to support your decision in order to help you. It’s important you communicate how their lack of support is affecting you. I’m sending you my support pack Standing Up For Yourself to help you get your point across.
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