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Don't Hide Your Period From Your Sons, They Need To Know About Them Too

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Boys should learn about periods too. Here's why it matters.

When it comes to raising kids, many of us know that we should be telling our daughters about periods – and the sooner you do it, the better, as some can start as early as eight years old.  

But what about our sons? Should we be educating them on periods at this stage, too?

That’s the question one parent put to the masses on Mumsnet recently, asking: “Does your son know what a period is?”

The user said she was never told about periods growing up, and neither was her mum, so it “came as a surprise” and she “learnt about it and dealt with it” on her own – an experience that’s all too common.

She said: “I am now raising two girls and a son and it’s made me wonder how many people don’t talk to their children about it and how many do – but particularly sons.”

The parent said her son is the eldest child, so it’s “around the time we’d have these conversations”, whereas her girls are toddlers.

The responses to her query were varied, but most seemed to agree that involving boys in these discussions is important. 

One person said their son has “known about it in some way” since he was old enough to ask what sanitary pads and tampons were – around the age of three or four.

“He’s a teenager now, though, so obviously knows all about it,” they added.

Another said: “I’ve always talked openly about everything to do with the body. So all my children have the understanding. I think it’s just as important my son understands as my daughter does.”

Why should boys learn about periods?

Typically, children in the UK are taught about puberty in Years 5 and 6, between the ages of 10 and 12 years old. This is in line with government advice that the topic of puberty shouldn’t be taught before Year 4.

But experts agree that conversations about periods can (and should) start at home even earlier than that. 

Joeli Brearley, founder of Pregnant Then Screwed and co-host of parenting podcast To Be a Boy, told HuffPost UK: “The earlier you talk to your boys about periods the better. They are a normal part of everyday life and nothing to be ashamed of.
“When kids are younger they often come to the toilet with you, so I started talking to my boys about periods from when they were very, very young – explaining that girls and women bleed every month from their vagina and that this is perfectly normal for us, but boys don’t bleed.”
She added that as they got older, they began to talk about sex and how babies were made – and she linked periods to the shedding of the womb, explaining that a period is usually a sign that you are not pregnant.
“I have recently explained to them what the menopause is. They are now nine and 11 years old,” she added.
According to experts at teacher planning tool Twinkl, “it’s essential to include all genders into the conversation of periods, as this will help to remove the mystery, shame and stigmas around the topic”.

Indeed, a survey by Bodyform and YouGov found 27% of girls have missed school due to their period, citing embarrassment and shame-related factors as the main reasons.

What’s more, 137,000 boys admitted to teasing about periods at school, with 45% saying they do it because they feel awkward. And an eye-watering 94% of all surveyed boys admitted to not knowing a lot about periods either.

How to talk to boys about periods

Planet Puberty has some really helpful advice for kickstarting conversations with boys about periods. It suggests that before you begin, it’s a good idea to teach about the differences between boys’ and girls’ bodies.

Instead of having a ‘serious’ sit-down period conversation, it might be better to have period chats during normal, everyday interactions.

For example, you could ask your child to help you put away sanitary products after going shopping (which could prompt a conversation about what they’re for).

Some helpful phrases include “a period is when blood comes out of a girl’s vagina” and “girls get their period when they start puberty. It means they are growing up”. 

And perhaps most crucially, given the sheer number of boys teasing classmates over their periods: “It’s important not to make fun of people’s period.” (You can find more conversation pointers here.)

“I think it is really important to speak to boys about women’s reproductive health to prevent periods from being seen as somehow dirty or abnormal,” said Brearley.
“The more you, as their parent, normalise this the more likely boys are to not shame a girl for having a period when they are older.”
And the less girls are shamed, the more they can thrive. 




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