‘Fountain Of Youth’ Looked Perfect On Paper, But Was A Major Flub For Apple TV+
This weekend I reactivated my Apple TV+ subscription, which I cancelled following the Severance season finale, to watch their newest treasure-seeking action film, Fountain of Youth, starring John Krasinski and Natalie Portman.
On paper, it had all the right elements to justify a $9.99 fee: established leads, supporting roles featuring Eiza González, Domhall Gleeson, and Stanley Tucci, gorgeous sets, a smorgasbord of foreign destinations, and costume design that screamed Banana Republic, but in practice, that formulaic approach fell flat. Imitation may be the greatest form of flattery, but it’s not enough to replicate the magic of the Indiana Jones or Mummy franchises.
Frankly, I think this film was trying to spoof too many films at the same time. The familial relationship between Krasinski, Portman, and child actor Benjamin Chivers feels like an attempt to go after the family-friendly action niche dominated by Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson’s films like Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle or Jungle Cruise.
When you layer in the decision to cast González, who is 35, as 45-year-old Krasinski’s love interest, with Portman much closer in age at 43, it begs the question of whether ageist stereotypes are being perpetuated, and if audiences really want to see James Bond-esque age gaps in 2025.
González gives an amazing performance as the mystic and spiritual protector of the eponymous fountain, reminiscent of Oded Fehr’s role as Medjai Ardeth Bay in 1999’s The Mummy, but without the same substantive backstory. Her character warns of the fountain’s curse, but because the true danger is is not revealed until the very end, this storyline falls apart under the slightest scrutiny. Stanley Tucci makes a roughly two-minute long cameo as her ‘boss’, serving only as a plot mechanism to introduce a key that can ‘shut down’ the fountain in the event that the wrong person drinks from it.
We see this take place when Domhall Gleeson’s billionaire villain, Owen Carver’s self-absorption causes him to be consumed by the power of the fountain, transforming him into the stereotypical progressively CGI desiccated face we know and love from the Jones franchise. González’s character uses the key to ‘contain’ him within the crypt-like chamber, but Gleeson is no Imhotep, and does not seem to be able to wield the fountain’s power at all, let alone move from his current location, so locking him up seems to be a moot point.
Knowing this nonviolent option was available all along, the numerous fight scenes where González aims to stop Krasinski and crew from reaching the fountain appear unnecessary to the plot. What they do achieve is a structure that allows the plot to spoof films like Ocean’s Eleven, Titanic, The DaVinci Code, and National Treasure as the treasure hunt slash chase moves from one clue slash foreign destination to the next.
While the film’s ending leaves room for a sequel, I’m really hoping Apple TV+ gives this IP the same ending as it’s titular fountain. Leave it alone, and forget it ever existed.